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That GIRL

JOLENE TAN

14 September 1993

St. Anthony's Canossian Secondary School

Girl Guides- FLOWERPECKER PL

Sec 1/5
Sec 2/4
Sec 3/9 :)

Love GOD
Love BEING A CHILD OF GOD
LoveHARBORLIGHT CHURCH
Love ALL MY CHURCH & SCHOOL FRIENDS
Love MY PATROL
Love the PURPLE SUNSET
Love the BALLOONS
Love the CANDLES
Love the BBQ
Love THE LIFE I have(:



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Sunday, March 15, 2009
Relief
11:15 PM


YES the AWESOME WEEKENDS is OVER.
I am still in a ULTRA PANIC-ING MOOD
Cause I just finish my Physics online project.
OH MAN
HAD to rush for it within 28mins
to be EXACT.
I was like type type type!!
transfer transfer
I am going NUTS
so in the end
I send it in like 30 mins LATE
but nevermind
At least we did it
NOT SO BAD
We are supposed to do it groups of SIX?
Now we are doing in groups of 2
WE just couldn't contact the REST
WHAT??
HAHAHAHHAA

Let's not talk about THAT
My parents came back from MALAYSIA
which means today NIGHT.
is the END of my relaxing and AWESOME weekend
But I am sure I enjoy this WEEKEND!!
I enjoyed EVERY SINGLE BIT of it

I told myself
to wipe off all WORRIES and PROBLEMS
and just enjoy this WEEK
cause i never know when will I have such a privilege
to come on SAT(the whole thing) and SUNDAY
Although I KNOW God will plan this AGAIN
I think God wanted me to just let go off everything
cause this week was TERRIBLE
I was pretty overwhelmed with TONS of things
Also, quite drained spiritually, mentally and emotionally.
there are just so many problems attacking me in all DIRECTIONS
PLUS my ENG tuition TOO.
OH MAN
I really dunno.
I am just going to LET God decide for me
I am tired of CRACKING my LITTLE brain cells thinking.
PART of my emotional problem was SOLVED on SAT
AWESOME before I went church
PRAISE GOD!!
I was so relieved after that

RESULTS I DUN EVEN WANT TO THINK OF it
It is the WORST in my 4 years of secondary SCHOOL
PGA STUFF is starting to pile up.
must start preparing my speech
study on Singapore and Guides history
AHH
and BLAH BLAH

I must say I REALLY REALLY ENJOYED this weekend
although I had to RUSH from place to place on FRI
just to get this AWESOME SAT AND SUN
It is really WORTH IT.
SAT.
I got to WORSHIP with my heart and SOUL
OH MAN
That feeling is so GREAT!!
I really HUNGER for MORE.
I am really always popping in between worships and everything
That I hardly had a chance to enjoy the WHOLE thing
MAN!!
AT least this once I DID.
I really have to TREASURE IT

I must say that God really plans everything for me
It seems that everything being preached boils down to
WORSHIPPING God even through PROBLEMS!
Even when you know that U are about to go MAD over them.
You must seek peace from God.
And JOY.
i really need that.
I am hardly HAPPY since the start of the YEAR.
Not a good START
HAHAHA

SUNDAY was WOW WOW WOW!!
I got to come CHURCH EARLY!!
LIKE one SUNDAY!
OH MY GOSH!!
UNBELIEVABLE.
WORSHIP is SUPER AWESOME

OH OH!!
THE taxi FARE
I must remember to return MONEY!!
AHHH
I feel so BAD for not PAYING at all!!
HAHAHAH
OWN $$$ PAY $$$
a reminder for MYSELF

AHAHAHAHA
I got a lot of stuff from MALAYSIA!!
BUT the best was THIS!!
(:(:(:(: SO SMALL AND ADORABLE
HAHAHA!!
LIKE no BIG DEAL RIGHT!!
OKAY FINE.
HAHAHA compare and CONTRAST
That's my pit!! HHAHAH
LOOK AT THE SIZE!!
OH MY!!!
NOW for the REAL ONE!!
HAHAHHA
can u even SEE the tiny one?
HAHAHAHA
my GUITAR looks so GORGEOUS here!
HAHAHAHAH

HAHAHA
My parents bought that KEYCHAIN for me
But I will not even take it out?
SO FRAGILE.
I was PRETTY SHOCKED
I thought they were against me playing GUITAR!!
HAAHAHAHAH
But they bought that for ME!!
OH MY!!
I am melting!!
I LOVE IT!!

THIS IS LIPING!!
GREEDY!! Take TWO DRINKS
HHAHAHAH

May have SERVICE TOMORROW
I mean CIP!!
SO I think I should REST!!
I always SLEEP SO LATE!!
yesterday only have 5 hrs of SLEEP last night.
HHHAHAHAH
OFF to do TAWG!!
(:(:(:
SWEET DREAMS!!

I wish I can continue to wish
But I know it is pretty hopeless.
Now I really wish that you can just break my heart once and for all
to stop me from dreaming
just break my heart as hard as possible
just let it break
so I will wake up
And I can move on
I can start picking up the pieces and move on
I dun like to be hanging there
But I dun want to make the first move.
I fear rejection.
dun everyone fear that too.

THAT SWEET MOMENT.
THEY SEEM TO BELONG IN THEIR OWN BUBBLE
AND EVERYONE SEEMS TO NOT EXIST
THEY DUN EVEN SEEM TO REALISE
THAT THEY WERE IN THE SPOTLIGHT
IT WAS JUST HER AND HIM
HER JOKING AND HIS PRETENDING
THEY JUST MATCH
THEY DID NOT NEED TO PRETEND
THEY DUN NEED TO TRY TO COMMUNICATE
EVERYTHING JUST WORKED OUT FOR THEM
EVEN WHEN I KNOW ONLY ONE SIDE OF THE STORY
I KNOW THAT THEY ARE QUITE TO PLEASE WITH ONE ANOTHER
THEY DUN NEED OTHERS TO START A CONVERSION
unlike me
THEY JUST NEED EACH OTHER
THEIR LAUGHTER FILLED ME
makes me wonder
i HOPE THAT THEY WILL LAST FOREVER.

I wish this happened to me
But I just know I dun have the guts to do SO
I am just too fearful.
I just keep on thinking
and by the time I finished.
I already missed the chance
Why cant I treat everything normally?
Why do I think SO MUCH?
Maybe that is just ME.